Want to lose a guy after your first date? If you really want a new relationship, stop hitting the fast forward button after the first date. Too often I see girls go on one date, become overly clingy, then try to fast forward everything so that the potentially new relationship is at the same point where her last relationship left off, right before she broke up with her ex. Ladies, after being in a long-term relationship, you can find yourself back in the scary and dynamic dating world.

Whereas once you were a dating-pro, social media and online dating has turned you into a novice, with no idea what to do. What’s even worse, depending on how your previous relationship ended, you can be left feeling super insecure, hurt and sometimes desperate to make up for the time you spent in your last relationship. The date goes well and yet after a few back and forth text messages, he goes cold. You scared him away by trying to turn a first date into a long-term relationship.

We eventually said our goodbyes, and decided we would be in touch. I had not even made it to my car in the parking garage when she called me on my cell phone, asking me if I had a good time. I had not even started my car at this point when she started now text messaging me, asking me if I was on the same page with her and if I liked her enough to see her again. This barrage of texts carried on for about two weeks before she finally gave up, realizing I was not going to see her again.

Dating can be daunting. Most girls hate the thought of having to date a bunch of guys to replace a lost love. But trust me when I tell you that pushing too hard at the beginning will just push the guy away. You can’t force feeling comfortable with someone, or make a routine with someone you barely know. It’s good to communicate but don’t force things. Above all, be patient. Starting over always sucks, but if you give it time, the new relationship will almost always be worth the wait.